i know something is wrong. i don't know what it is, only that it is happening. now. i wish you could talk to me. i wish you would just tell me what problem exists. come on. tell me. what is so damn hard about sitting down, looking me in the eye and telling me what is bothering you? i mean really, what is the big "emergency" you are dealing with today? you're clearly indicating that something is amiss, but you just sit there "indicating" without divulging any further information or asking for help. let me guess, it's a problem at work. your internet won't work or Jane belittled you in front of the freelancer again. or maybe it's your recumbent bicycle. jesus christ, will you just buckle down and buy a car already, or at least a bike that people can see you riding? i swear to god, if this is another issue with the trainer at the gym i'm going to drive off a cliff. you need to tell him, once and for all, that his balls in your face do not motivate you to do more crunches. do they? wait, is that the emergency? you're warning me that you want your trainer's balls in your face more often? that you actually like the rising and falling of your head into the general direction of his genitalia? wow, i hadn't thought about that. i hadn't considered that this could be the emergency.
i agree, that is one hell of an emergency.